Greetings!

Some fans wonder what it’s like to be a writer.  For the most part, it’s rather boring.  There’s usually no one around while you’re working.  It’s just you, the computer, and…all that chocolate cake in the fridge. You can imagine what usually gets most of the attention in this scenario.

Well, a day is much like any other day.  I get out of bed in the morning, think about what I have to do, notice the things in my life that I’m thankful for.  For example, as autumn begins to approach, I thank the Universe that another hurricane skirted past Florida instead of hitting us dead on.  Although Fay dumped enough rain on the state to remind us that we are basically floating over an aquifer that is often precarious. (Think sinkholes here.)  Florida is a great state to live in.  Every year, we have the daylights scared out of us for…oh, about three months, when super hurricanes blaze across the Atlantic ocean and promise to blow us off the map.  Insurance doesn’t help.  If it’s water, you’re in trouble.  Fire, they can handle.  Water…not so much.  If you have any property at all in Florida, you know that if left to its own device, your yard will turn into a tropical rain forest, or a jungle housing enough squirrels to sink an aircraft carrier. (Maybe that’s stretching it a tad.) 

Seriously, there are so many perks to living in Florida.  It’s never dull.  Raccoons will be sure to tear open the garbage to get to the pizza box inside, and pretty much drag everything all over the jungle…er…I mean, yard.  When they are done dragging the trash everywhere, they will poop somewhere that my dog will find it and roll in it.  As I’m cursing raccoons the world over and washing the raccoon poop off the dog, the mosquitoes cover me like the shroud of Turin.  If I even attempt to swat at them, it will only result in me swatting pet shampoo into my eye.  Still washing the dog, my back starts to feel like someone just put an iron on it.  I realize that feeling is merely the rays of the Florida sun beating down on me.  Darn, I forgot to put on sunscreen.  No matter…the mosquitoes will help cut those ultraviolet rays.  I won’t be in the yard long enough to get a sunburn, anyway.  If I were savvy, I’d have a timer on my watch that reminds me that once I exceed twenty minutes in mid-summer Florida weather, I will pass out from the heat and humidity. Alas, I don’t have a watch.  Nor am I savvy.  Besides, the mosquitoes are just a minor nuisance, unless, of course, encephalitis rears its ugly head.  Ooo, that’s not a good thought.  No worries.  It’s the wrong month for encephalitis.  This is more the month for malaria.

No, really….  Mornings in Florida are fabulous.  It’s so nice to grab a cup of coffee and sit on the back porch to watch the osprey…eeks, drag off a two thousand dollar prize koi from the fifteen hundred dollar pond I just built.  Watch out for that snake.  And don’t smoosh the lizard that’s claimed my chair as his territory.  Is that lizard poop I just put my arm on?  Ick!   Oh, s**t, the snake just ate a frog.  Gross.  And what squirrel left acorn pieces all over my bicycle seat?  D**mmit, can’t I have any peace around here?  For once, can’t I just sit in the backyard and enjoy the view without poop being somewhere, spiders crawling on me, ants attacking the dog, and snakes sneaking into the house?

Hey, is that snake poisonous?  Where’s the @*! dog now? 

“Do not, absolutely do not roll in the raccoon poop again! I will ship you to the pound, I swear I will! Get in the house, dog!  Get in the house right now.”

Maybe I should just go back inside and work on my new book.

Almost the moment I step into my house, an explosive sound rips through the neighborhood and the power instantly blinks off.  Another transformer blew apart. 

Sigh.  Just another day in the life of C. D. Blizzard.  It’s not so bad really.  I’m sure the power will be back on in about eight hours.

See.  My life is pretty much like everyone else’s.

Copyright 2008  C. D. Blizzard    www.cdblizzard.com